Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Welcome to heartbreak



I am back from the cottage... did you miss me? Of course you did. My weekend was actually suprisingly beautiful and peaceful of course until we got home yesterday. All of you who know me understand I have been diagnosed with bi-polar II or possibly Borderline Personality disorder. This diagnosis and illness causes me to behave in ways that are not conducive to a healthy marriage or relationship for that matter. I destroy every single good relationship I have had. So of course in the spirit of destroying good things I have had numerous affairs on my husband. He had accepted what I have done in the past but I had promised with my new meds and therapy I was going to get better and not do it anymore. Of course I couldn't keep that promise and met another person on Craigslist (the death of me) and made plans to hook up. My hubby found out about this and without saying a word about it all weekend, went on like nothing was wrong. Then he calmly told me he has contacted a lawyer and is going to start divorce proceedings. Besides being shocked and devastated, I was actually scared....really scared for the first time in a long time. Truth be told there is no way in hell I can actually support my kids on my income. Of course he would keep his child (my youngest) but he is not going to keep his stepchildren or support them.



He told me I have lots to think about... I wrote him a letter and poured my heart out. I told him things I have told no one........EVER.






Things are on a trial basis for now. He thinks I should take the divorce and find the tattooed and pierced boy I am looking for. I say no one wants me. We are at an impasse. Lets see how it goes.






Oh and because I promised here is some cottage pics.














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